My Love/Hate Relationship with Small Local Businesses: or, Why I Became the Popcorn Queen in Four Hours Flat

I'm going out on another limb here, committing several levels of heresy, I'm sure, but I'll come righ out and say what other people probably are thinking but just can't find the nerve to say:

I have a love/hate relationship with locally owned small businesses.

I love them, because, well, they're my neighbors, and I want my neighborhood to thrive, and I like knowing the people who sell me my goods; but I hate them, because they seem to think that if they are locally owned neighborhood businesses the notion of good business and customer service practices can be thrown right out the window.

Exhibit One: last night, four p.m. Baboo is a part of a neighborhood association and was the point person for a Movie Night event: an outdoor free movie at a local park with popcorn and soda for sale. Everything went without a hitch.

Everything, that is, but the popcorn. Baboo made arrangements for a local mom and pop popcorn shop to provide the popcorn; but when I went to pick it up, at four p.m., during their regular business hours, I find a sign saying "sorry, we are doing a fundraiser at a local school; shop is closed, sorry for the inconvenience."

Are you kidding me? ARE YOU KIDDING ME? This is not cool. Unfortunately, this is also not unusual for the locally owned businesses in my area. There's a coffee shop down the street that I would frequent more, except that everytime I want to spend my money there, they are closed. I can't even begin to predict their hours, as they are something like "every other Saturday, except when a good Seinfeld re-run is on, then we might close early." And then they wonder why revenue is down, why people don't come.

Look, I understand that it is tough as a sole proprietor, and that keeping costs in check is crucial. But really. Hours of business should be consistent, predictable, and most important, HONORED. If I make a special trip to your business and your door is locked during business hours, I'm going somewhere else to spend my money where I know the door will be open when they say they will be. And I am not likely to give you a second chance. The few bucks you spend in labor to get someone to cover the front of the house for you will be more than repaid in repeat business and goodwill.

As for me, at four p.m., with an event scheduled to start at 8 and a school function to attend in between, I had to swing into crisis management mode; I got my biggest pot, my Coleman stove, and popcorn popping supplies from the local grocer (which was, in fact, open for bidness, hallelujah), and started popping at seven P.M. I must say, it turned out better than expected; we sold plenty and we had real butter. Everyone who wanted popcorn got it. Baboo learned a lesson about delegating and event planning. I got to cook for a horde, which I love to do.

But now I have a bad taste in my mouth for this particular business. And I wish I didn't.

Three Bucks A Day Gourmet: Lunch at Chez Loose Change

Today, I made brunch for the bunch. Total damage is as follows:

french toast (10 eggs, 1 loaf whole grain bread, 1/2 loaf apple danish bread, milk, cinnamon, vanilla, sugar).

bacon (26 slices)

milk (1/2 gallon)

and no leftovers.

Donations of farm animals would be appreciated. kthxbye.

It's The Little Things

Today's gift: after a rough morning in court, a voicemail from my in-laws, telling me they are thinking of me and love me.

Low Impact Larger Family Living: Check Craigslist First

Y'all know I love me some Ikea, and y'all also know I have five, count'em, five kidlets, ages 6 thru 9. Although we have a biggish house, we have smallish bedrooms and the kids are at the age where private space would be a wonderful thing. I have been eyeing these loft beds at Ikea: They would get all the kids out of bunks and open up a bunch of floor space, especially for my daughter, who has a postage stamp sized room (but a room of her own, which every girl needs). I could whip up some fun privacy curtains for the bottoms and each kid could have a quiet space to read, think, get away from siblings, even those that share a room.

However. Five times 199.00 is a little steep for us right now. We were going to have to bite the bullet and do something, though, because one of the bunk beds is broken. Soooo, I planned to take a little trip to Ikea next weekend to get two.

Except my sweet Baboo, ever the environmentalist, said "maybe we should check Craigslist first." And when we did, we stumbled upon four (count 'em, FOUR) of this exact model, barely used, all available, and some with extra add on shelves and desks to boot. The grand total for all four? $525. Saved at least 300 bucks, saved the impact of manufacturing four new beds, and saved the time and cost of driving to Schaumburg.

Okay, not that last part, because I'm still going to Ikea next weekend. :p

The moral of the story? Check Craigslist or Freecycle first. And if you have a trip planned to Ikea, for heaven's sake, don't cancel it.

Taming the Stepmonster: How I Avoid Burnout

I am the mother of five: two of my own children, three stepsons whom I love as my own. Most times we live in relative peace and harmony, for which I am eternally grateful. They know I love and respect them, and most of the time they love and respect me back. Not bad as far as parenting goes.

But then there are those days. We all have them. But generally speaking, around here "those days" can be traced not to me or their dad, but to something or someone else. The anger, frustration, disrespect comes out sideways. And though I am no psychologist, I am aware and smart enough to know that displaced anger and frustration only comes out when children feel safe. Again, the fact that my children feel safe with me and their dad/stepdad leaves me thankful beyond measure.

Still, it is frustrating. Even when you do not have a combative or mentally unstable co-parent, it can be difficult to be the container for all the anger and frustration a child may feel. Multiply times five, and you have a recipe for emotional exhaustion.

The solution? Disengage. Look at parenting as a spiritual process, in which you are asked to show the love of Christ/loving kindness to everyone, including your children and their other parents. Sometimes this requires careful listening. Sometimes this requires telling the truth in love, in a child's terms. Sometimes this merely requires granting God's blessing to the other parent. Sometimes it requires holding a crying child and reassuring that things will be all right. In any circumstance, it requires you, the parent, to empty yourself of desires, pride, and what have you and allow yourself to react with kindness to every situation.

This is easier said than done. Most times I trend more toward "postal episode" than "spiritual practice." But I am learning and working on it, and I encourage those of you who are working on it too to have heart. You are simply planting seeds which may or may not bear fruit; but it is the planting and not the fruit that is your responsibility.

For Everything Else There's The Debit Card

Family membership to Discovery World: $75.00

Parking: $5.00

Ice cream: $12.00

Watching my kids squeal with delight as seagulls swoop down to catch their sandwich crusts in mid air?

Priceless.