Kyrie Eleison: Have Mercy on Me, Please

Y'all, I have had a tough week here; won't go into details but suffice it to say we are focusing on the basics right now. Please bear with me as I get back into the swing of things.

Gettin' On My Soap Box: The Laundry Detergent Debacle

Over at Trent Hamm's excellent blog The Simple Dollar, Trent deals with a recurring, ongoing matter of great fiscal importance; it's the cause of many highly emotionally charged posts and comments, dividing good, kind, tax-paying, God-fearing people into snarling mobs.

No, it isn't health care reform. It's laundry detergent. Like many serious frugalistas, Trent home-brews his own laundry detergent. The recipe is here. It's very simple, and very cheap to make. Trent calculates his cost at about .0225 per load (that's two and a quarter cents per load). This is very inexpensive compared to, say, Tide with Bleach at regular price at the grocery store, which runs about .20 per load (twenty cents per load). With this one decision, Trent calculates that he saves about sixty five bucks a year (or six hundred fifty bucks over ten years, or . . . well, you do the math).

It is amazing to me -- simply amazing -- how much flack Trent gets for this one particular decision from his readers. And I think it is symptomatic of a couple of things that are currently plaguing American society.

For one thing it's interesting that for most people, laundry detergent is consistently on the "to buy" list. This is curious to me, as I don't buy it very often at all, and a 300 ounce jug (which is supposed to last 100 loads) lasts my family a good 4 to 5 months. Second, it's interesting how much brand loyalty is out there. Otherwise rational people appear to get totally incensed when someone insinuates Tide is overpriced and overmarketed -- you'll pry their Tide from their cold, dead hands, thanks very much. And it's wild to note how many people don't think they have the time or the energy to take the five minutes making a batch of laundry soap requires out of a 24 hour day, but seem to have lots of time to devote to snarking about other people's decisions on a personal finance blog.

All that said, I'm most bewildered by the people who seem . . . well, flabbergasted that someone knew how to do such a thing. It's as if they believed laundry detergent has just always existed and someone came along and tried to replace The Real Thing with a sad imitation.

Reality check, people: laundry detergent, like 98 percent of everything else at the grocery store and the drug store and the Wal-Marts (I know it's Wal-Mart, but that's what we called it down south, "the Wal-Marts"), is an artificially created need. Yep, that's right, you don't really NEED laundry detergent, at least not in the form it is presented at the store. Trent's stuff is the real deal -- actually, Trent's stuff is a little bit gussied up; all our forefathers used for "warsching" was boiling water, soap (usually lye soap they made themselves), and a rock to beat it on. All other manner of washing paraphernalia are just variations on a theme.

Y'all, there is a happy medium. We can all just get along on this issue of grave importance to the American people.

• If you want to make your own laundry detergent, knock yourself out. Keep a couple of things in mind, though. One, it does tend to gel up pretty well, so you won't be able to decant it into smaller jugs -- the big honking bucket is what you'll need to keep it in, and that may be risky if you have pets or toddlers. Also, I don't think it is approved for high efficiency washers, and I frankly ain't risking voiding the warranty on mine. Finally, I used to make this homebrew myself (GASP!! THE HORROR!!) and over time I noticed a soap buildup that made my clothes a little dingy and faded. I didn't like that. Your mileage may vary. God speed to ya.
• If you love that clean linen scent, I am not going to fault you one bit for loving your Tide. Hey, we all have our simple pleasures. If you are brand loyal, you can still work to get your cost per usage down to the lowest it can be and still have your Tide Simple Pleasures Lavendar and Lily Pad Scent With Bleach For Cold Water Machines. I explain how to do that here. Also, consider using less. Bump your usage down to the place where it's painful or doesn't work, then bump it back up a notch.
• If, like me, you prefer the convenience of premade laundry detergent but wish to minimize your cost per usage to very very low or none at all (!!) yes, it can be done, and yes, I do that on a regular basis. If you aren't brand loyal, laundry detergent can be had for cheap or free after coupons, sales, and rebates. I have at least 150 loads worth of laundry detergent down in my basement that cost me nothing. Nada. And in fact, I made a little money on some of it. If this kind of frugality rings your chimes, stick around. I can help.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I'll be stepping off my soap box and rinsing out the inside to get the last bits out before I recycle the box.

Luvs $5/1 Coupon Today and Tomorrow

Go here to sign up for the Luvs Network and get the Luvs welcome kit, which includes a coupon for FIVE DOLLARS off ONE package of Luvs diapers. I have it from a reliable source that tomorrow, September 15, 2009, there will be a link to another Luvs $5.00/1 coupon. Even if you don't have babies, it's a good way to score some diapers for women's shelters.

Dave Ramsey Baby Emergency Fund Giveaway!

Hi, I'm Donna, and Dave Ramsey is my hero.

Don't you know Dave? He is a spectacular motivational speaker and author and his passion is helping people to reach financial freedom. His personal finance advice is sound; if you're a Christian, it's also Biblically based. It's Dave's system that got the ground under our feet financially when Baboo and I joined forces. And he has the heart of a teacher.

Dave is giving away a whole lot of money, in $999 dollar increments, here. Check back every day for the new code word. Enter once a day, every day, as long as the giveaway is running. You can also register to get Dave's updates and tips via e-mail or mobile phone. Also, Dave is running a special on his entire inventory of personal finance books, workbooks, and tools; each is only $9.99, with free shipping for orders over $65. His books are inspirational, full of good advice, and are quick and easy reads. Go and win your baby emergency fund, courtesy of Dave!!!

Link Luv: Twelve Money Saving Hacks from Trent at the Simple Dollar

Trent at www.thesimpledollar.com is one of my favorite personal finance writers, and he posted a great list of twelve money saving hacks for substituting cheaper and more environmentally friendly products in place of disposable or commercially created products. Go check it out here.

You Sweet Talker: Spectacular Deals on Box Top For Education Products at Pick N Save This Week

Ladies and gentlemen: start your printers.


This week at Pick and Save, beginning today, Thursday, September 10 through Wednesday, September 16, there are SPECTACULAR sales
on Box Top for Education products, as well as a Bonus Box Top promotion. When you buy 10 Box Top for Education products in one order, you receive 50 bonus box tops (a $5 value for your school) and when you buy 15 products in one order, you recieve 100 bonus box tops (a $10 value for your school).


There are also SPECTACULAR coupons in the coupons.com blue bar on the left side of this blog, for very high value coupons for Box Top for Education products, including General Mills and Cascadian Farms cereals, snacks, and granola bars, Pillsbury biscuits and doughs, Betty Crocker products, Huggies diapers and wipes, Kotex pads and liners, Scott and Cottonelle paper products, and Ziploc products. You can also get high value coupons at http://www.bettycrocker.com/


If you wait until Wednesday and take these coupons with you, the first five you hand to the cashier will double in value. This will make some of these products FREE.


Also, if you buy FOUR General Mills granola bar snack boxes (including Chex Mix, Fiber One, and Nature Valley) you will get a FREE coupon for a gallon of milk.


If you're from my kids' school, or you have kids at any school, here's a quick and dirty deal that will get you 6 boxes of cereal, 4 boxes of granola bars, 2 tubes of biscuits, 3 boxes of Hamburger Helper, a coupon for a gallon of free milk, and 100 bonus box tops for education (a $10 value for your school) for about eighteen bucks.


Step one: Go to the blue bar and print out 6 coupons for your choice of General Mills cereals your family enjoys. There are coupons for .55 off one, .75 off one, and 1.00 off one selected cereals. While you're there, print off 2 coupons for 1.00 off 2 Grands biscuits, one coupon for .75/3 boxes of Hamburger Helper, and coupons for your choice of four boxes General Mills granola bars, which are anywhere from .50-.60/1 (you'll need four) to 1.00/2 (you'll need two).


Step two: Go to Pick and Save on Wednesday; pick out the six cereals, four granola bars, two tubes biscuits, and 3 boxes Hamburger Helper that match the coupons you have.


Step three: Go to the register. Hand the lady your Pick and Save Card, and five coupons that have the highest value (Ideally, you want to hand the lady 5 coupons for 1.00 off, but make sure you hand the lady the five highest value coupons you have). Let her ring them up. If you have 5 1.00 off coupons, it will take 10.00 off your total.


Step four: hand the lady the rest of the coupons. These will not double, but will still take the face value of the coupons off your bill.


Step five: pay the lady. Wait for her to give you change and your receipts. Check the receipts in your hand. You should have the register tape, one coupon for one gallon of milk, and one coupon for 100 bonus box tops in your hand.


Step six: Eat the food (or donate it if it's non-perishable), send the box tops to school with your kid, and put the coupon for the gallon of milk in your wallet for next week's grocery run.


If you so desire, rinse, repeat. If you don't go on Wednesday, no sweat: your total will be five dollars higher or so, but that is still a screaming deal for all that stuff; about 1.45 per item, including the milk, and you got ten bucks to donate to your kids' school. It's all good and for a great cause. Also, remember to trim the Box Tops off the boxes you got!! And for an even sweeter deal for the PTA, buy Scrip for Pick and Save for a little extra oomph. Your twenty bucks can go a long, long way for Roosevelt or Immanuel this week.


If you'd like to see the other deals you can get matching printable coupons with sale prices at Pick and Save and Sentry, check back often!

I Learned From The Master

I'm so excited to announce that I am affiliated with RefundCents!! RefundCents, led by the coupon diva Michele Easter, is a fabulous online and print refund/rebate clearinghouse and newsletter. I've been a fan of Michele and her site for a long time, and Refund Cents is one of perhaps three online sites that really has a finger on the pulse of couponing, rebating, and refunding.

I am a big big fan of her online service, which gives her personal updates daily, as well as providing a message board for subscribers. It is worth every single penny, and I highly recommend it. If you'd like a taste of her site and what it can provide to you, please visit her via the button on the top left corner of the blog.

Why I Love My Husband: Reasons #19,236-37

#19236) This morning, I asked the Leg Puller if he brushed his teeth. After some hesitation, he admitted he'd only used "the swishy stuff." (mouthwash) Baboo, who was washing a banana bread pan from yesterday (which, come to think of it, is another reason I love him, but I digress), showed him how swishing the pan with water left stuff on the pan, but using the scrub brush got all the gunk off the pan. "It's the same with your teeth, buddy." Score one for the daddy.

#19237) My laundry was in a basket on the bed for me to fold. I HATE carrying laundry up from the basement.

My Love/Hate Relationship with Small Local Businesses: or, Why I Became the Popcorn Queen in Four Hours Flat

I'm going out on another limb here, committing several levels of heresy, I'm sure, but I'll come righ out and say what other people probably are thinking but just can't find the nerve to say:

I have a love/hate relationship with locally owned small businesses.

I love them, because, well, they're my neighbors, and I want my neighborhood to thrive, and I like knowing the people who sell me my goods; but I hate them, because they seem to think that if they are locally owned neighborhood businesses the notion of good business and customer service practices can be thrown right out the window.

Exhibit One: last night, four p.m. Baboo is a part of a neighborhood association and was the point person for a Movie Night event: an outdoor free movie at a local park with popcorn and soda for sale. Everything went without a hitch.

Everything, that is, but the popcorn. Baboo made arrangements for a local mom and pop popcorn shop to provide the popcorn; but when I went to pick it up, at four p.m., during their regular business hours, I find a sign saying "sorry, we are doing a fundraiser at a local school; shop is closed, sorry for the inconvenience."

Are you kidding me? ARE YOU KIDDING ME? This is not cool. Unfortunately, this is also not unusual for the locally owned businesses in my area. There's a coffee shop down the street that I would frequent more, except that everytime I want to spend my money there, they are closed. I can't even begin to predict their hours, as they are something like "every other Saturday, except when a good Seinfeld re-run is on, then we might close early." And then they wonder why revenue is down, why people don't come.

Look, I understand that it is tough as a sole proprietor, and that keeping costs in check is crucial. But really. Hours of business should be consistent, predictable, and most important, HONORED. If I make a special trip to your business and your door is locked during business hours, I'm going somewhere else to spend my money where I know the door will be open when they say they will be. And I am not likely to give you a second chance. The few bucks you spend in labor to get someone to cover the front of the house for you will be more than repaid in repeat business and goodwill.

As for me, at four p.m., with an event scheduled to start at 8 and a school function to attend in between, I had to swing into crisis management mode; I got my biggest pot, my Coleman stove, and popcorn popping supplies from the local grocer (which was, in fact, open for bidness, hallelujah), and started popping at seven P.M. I must say, it turned out better than expected; we sold plenty and we had real butter. Everyone who wanted popcorn got it. Baboo learned a lesson about delegating and event planning. I got to cook for a horde, which I love to do.

But now I have a bad taste in my mouth for this particular business. And I wish I didn't.

A New Feature and A Sneek Peek at the New Giveaway

First of all, I was delighted to find that I actually have. a. follower!!! Thanks, Brook!! Basically, someone out there finds me entertaining or helpful enough to have my link on a feed or delivered to their inbox. In honor of this, I added a sidebar to highlight my followers. I'd love, love, love to have a bunch. Please subscribe!!! Please comment!! I'd love to hear from you and "see" you.

Second, to "encourage" some of you who may be on the fence, I'm giving you a lil' sneek peek at the next giveaway I have planned . . . .

http://www.blueq.com/

I mean, how can I NOT own that adorable coffee money coin purse? And how can you not let me give you one?

It's The Little Things

Today's gift: after a rough morning in court, a voicemail from my in-laws, telling me they are thinking of me and love me.

Taming the Stepmonster: How I Avoid Burnout

I am the mother of five: two of my own children, three stepsons whom I love as my own. Most times we live in relative peace and harmony, for which I am eternally grateful. They know I love and respect them, and most of the time they love and respect me back. Not bad as far as parenting goes.

But then there are those days. We all have them. But generally speaking, around here "those days" can be traced not to me or their dad, but to something or someone else. The anger, frustration, disrespect comes out sideways. And though I am no psychologist, I am aware and smart enough to know that displaced anger and frustration only comes out when children feel safe. Again, the fact that my children feel safe with me and their dad/stepdad leaves me thankful beyond measure.

Still, it is frustrating. Even when you do not have a combative or mentally unstable co-parent, it can be difficult to be the container for all the anger and frustration a child may feel. Multiply times five, and you have a recipe for emotional exhaustion.

The solution? Disengage. Look at parenting as a spiritual process, in which you are asked to show the love of Christ/loving kindness to everyone, including your children and their other parents. Sometimes this requires careful listening. Sometimes this requires telling the truth in love, in a child's terms. Sometimes this merely requires granting God's blessing to the other parent. Sometimes it requires holding a crying child and reassuring that things will be all right. In any circumstance, it requires you, the parent, to empty yourself of desires, pride, and what have you and allow yourself to react with kindness to every situation.

This is easier said than done. Most times I trend more toward "postal episode" than "spiritual practice." But I am learning and working on it, and I encourage those of you who are working on it too to have heart. You are simply planting seeds which may or may not bear fruit; but it is the planting and not the fruit that is your responsibility.

Ask For Socks and Ye Shall Receive

So, my dear sweet hubs has been patiently waiting to get himself some athletic socks, since he spent all the money allotted for his clothing budget on a black Sta-Puft Marshmallow -- I mean, Mountain HardWare down jacket on our anniversary trip to Schaumburg back in May. (Hush, I got engaged in Schaumburg. It was super romantic. Plus, there's IKEA there!!!).

Anyway, since we do the Dave Ramsey thing, he's in the red and will be until August, but has a run coming up with one of the kids, and the last thing we all want is a daddy-type with owies on his feets. So we were going to go today to get athletic socks, and he was just gonna be in the hole that much longer.

Except last night, we got an e-mail coupon from Kohl's for $10 off any purchase to get people in the store after the local Kohl's completed their remodel. (Incidentally, I used two of these in June to get myself some running shoes.) Is God telling us He loves us and is providing in all ways, large and small? Or is He just telling us we need to get off our rears and get on the treadmill?

Dunno. Either way, thanks, God!!!